Giving relationship advice of any kind.

Q: Hi Mama Mozzone!
I’m having trouble balancing school, work, and the impending doom of entering the job market. Anyway to keep my head above water?

A: First of all, try not to let the job market thing affect you. If you’re graduating in June, it’s much much too early to try and apply for jobs (trust me, I’ve tried). You’ll have better luck applying in April or May. If you’re struggling with work, I’d recommend quitting one of your jobs, or asking to cut back on hours if you have one big job.

Q: Mama HELP! My mom called me on the phone while I was HIGH! and i ANSWERED! My overwhelming fear of her makes me paranoid that she knew and is plotting from 800 miles away to murder me! Any survival tips :[|]

A: Oh no!! The only way to find out is to call her again and see if she seems suspicious… but worst case, she’ll just be mildly disappointed (I’m assuming you’re 21 and it’s fully legal for you to be smoking). In the future, help your future self and put your phone on do not disturb! Put it far away!

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